Lenten Comics day 19

STATION SIX

Jesus is Scourged + Crowned with Thorns

Then the soldiers of the governor took Jesus into the governor’s headquarters, and they gathered the whole cohort around him. They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and after twisting some thorns into a crown, they put it on his head. They put a reed in his right hand and knelt before him and mocked him, saying, “Hail, King of the Jews!” They spat on him, and took the reed and struck him on the head.

Lenten Comics day 18

Dad wasn’t interested in having a funeral, so we had a “celebration of life” thing with some people at the house. I really hate the terminology of that. Especially since I was filled with rage at the time (which has since cooled off). I did not feel like “celebrating” anything. So I referred to it as a memorial in rebellion. I love my dad a lot. But I am glad that is over.

Lenten Comics day 17

A eulogy for my dad.

We have only known about dad’s cancer since September. But he had been seriously ill for a few years with COPD. He’s been in the hospital about 5 times in the last three years, once with a collapsed lung.

I am “the family pastor.” So for those years, in the back of my mind has been the expectation that when the funeral came, it would be my responsibility. I lived in fear of this. Often, in a quiet moment, I would ponder the scriptures and try to imagine what I would talk about in relation to my dad’s death. I never landed on anything.

When the time came that we knew his death was immanent, I was told that dad did not want a funeral. There would be no ceremony. This came out because my dad hated funerals. He hated the way they made him feel and did not want one, nor was he keen on providing an opportunity for family members to act out (as has happened at previous family funerals).

So, my only responsibility was to coordinate with the cremation services and write dad’s obituary. But I couldn’t write the thing. I got on Facebook and wrote this. Just a raw reflection. Then I was able to do the obituary quite easily.

Lenten Comics day 16

Pausing the stations to reflect on Dad’s death.

This page took a long time to make, mostly because I just didn’t know what to draw for a long time. Then when I was nearly done, I left my sketchbook and markers out. Moments later, Davy walked into the kitchen proudly proclaiming, “I did it!” The page was no longer usable. So I had to start over. This one is better executed.

I am very excited about this sunrise using my cheap markers.

I miss my dad terribly, but he would’ve been stoked about that sunrise sequence.

-joshua.

Lenten Comics day 15

Sometimes all you can do is surrender.

But that is not nothing.

Lenten Comics day 14

My dad’s cancer ramped up and he passed away pretty horrifically by March 11. As I began to fall behind my own self-imposed deadlines, I found I just couldn’t keep making this comic. So I took some time off.

I am now returning to a practice that I find brings me great clarity and peace.

The comic is resuming with Station 5 and will be completed a few times a week.

I appreciate everyone who has been following these comics the last few years.

Lenten Comics day 13

STATION FIVE

Jesus is Judged by Pilate

Now at the festival the governor was accustomed to release a prisoner for the crowd, anyone whom they wanted. At that time they had a notorious prisoner, called Jesus Barabbas. So after they had gathered, Pilate said to them, “Whom do you want me to release for you, Jesus Barabbas or Jesus who is called the Messiah?” For he realized that it was out of jealousy that they had handed him over. While he was sitting on the judgment seat, his wife sent word to him, “Have nothing to do with that innocent man, for today I have suffered a great deal because of a dream about him.” Now the chief priests and the elders persuaded the crowds to ask for Barabbas and to have Jesus killed. The governor again said to them, “Which of the two do you want me to release for you?” And they said, “Barabbas.” Pilate said to them, “Then what should I do with Jesus who is called the Messiah?” All of them said, “Let him be crucified!” Then he asked, “Why, what evil has he done?” But they shouted all the more, “Let him be crucified!”

So when Pilate saw that he could do nothing, but rather that a riot was beginning, he took some water and washed his hands before the crowd, saying, “I am innocent of this man’s blood; see to it yourselves.”

-Matthew 27:15-24 (NRSV)

Lenten Comics day 12

Lenten Comics day 11

Judas betrayed Jesus.

Peter’s denial also marks a betrayal.

We don’t know Judas’ true motivation, although there are many theories. It is likely self-preservation was at the top.

That definitely seems to be the reason for Peter’s denial of Jesus, to whom he has sworn his loyalty.

He betrays the trust of his mentor and his friend. He betrays the one he identified as the Christ.

This station brought an opportunity for confession. But making a comic about that has been tricky. What is proper to confess publicly? How does that affect loved ones? I am making a comic about the reality of the spiritual life, they are not. How much of their personal lives do I have a right to document here? (This is why I have decided not to draw images of my father’s current suffering, and why there are so few comics with my wife and kids in them.)

But God has brought a great conviction to my heart in the last couple of months, that as I have faced things in the last five years that have brought sadness and anger, it is my wife and children who have shared the cost of those emotions.

My children in particular, four and two years old, who are the most likely to unwittingly provoke an anger sitting just beneath the surface. And they have been yelled at. And they have been cursed under breath. And they have been made to feel afraid at times. It is all verbal, but that does not mean it is not abusive.

This is shameful.

My calling as a father is to make my children feel loved and safe. There are times for discipline. But lashing out at the normal behaviors of young children is not discipline. As a child I was afraid of my grandfather’s or my father’s presence at times. I never want my children to think of me coming home with fear.

This betrayal of my children is also a betrayal of Christ. When I am angry at my kids, I am angry at Christ. When I yell at my kids, I am yelling at Christ.

I do not take this as a metaphor. If I am unloving toward my children, or my spouse, or my friends, or a stranger on the street - I am unloving toward Christ.

I am fortunate to have a wife + friend in Ashley who has been patient in this struggle of mine, who has called me out when I have reacted irrationally and hatefully without backing down, and who listens to my confession and offers love, support, + advice.

Family is a community.

When we sell one another out, we are as Judas who sold Jesus out.

When we deny one another, we are as Peter, denying Jesus.

Lenten Comics day 10

STATION FOUR

Jesus is Denied by Peter

Now Peter was sitting outside in the courtyard. A servant-girl came to him and said, “You also were with Jesus the Galilean.” But he denied it before all of them, saying, “I do not know what you are talking about.” When he went out to the porch, another servant-girl saw him, and she said to the bystanders, “This man was with Jesus of Nazareth.” Again he denied it with an oath, “I do not know the man.” After a little while the bystanders came up and said to Peter, “Certainly you are also one of them, for your accent betrays you.” Then he began to curse, and he swore an oath, “I do not know the man!” At that moment the cock crowed. Then Peter remembered what Jesus had said: “Before the cock crows, you will deny me three times.” And he went out and wept bitterly.

-Matthew 26: 69-75 (NRSV)

Lenten Comics day 7

STATION THREE

Jesus is Condemned by the Sanhedrin

Now the chief priests and the whole council were looking for false testimony against Jesus so that they might put him to death, but they found none, though many false witnesses came forward. At last two came forward and said, “This fellow said, ‘I am able to destroy the temple of God and to build it in three days.’” The high priest stood up and said, “Have you no answer? What is it that they testify against you?” But Jesus was silent. Then the high priest said to him, “I put you under oath before the living God, tell us if you are the Messiah, the Son of God.” Jesus said to him, “You have said so. But I tell you,

From now on you will see the Son of Man
    seated at the right hand of Power
    and coming on the clouds of heaven.”

Then the high priest tore his clothes and said, “He has blasphemed! Why do we still need witnesses? You have now heard his blasphemy. What is your verdict?” They answered, “He deserves death.”

-Matthew 26: 59-66 (NRSV)

Lenten Comics day 4

STATION TWO

Jesus, Betrayed by Judas, is Arrested

While he was still speaking, Judas, one of the twelve, arrived; with him was a large crowd with swords and clubs, from the chief priests and the elders of the people. Now the betrayer had given them a sign, saying, “The one I will kiss is the man; arrest him.” At once he came up to Jesus and said, “Greetings, Rabbi!” and kissed him. Jesus said to him, “Friend, do what you are here to do.” Then they came and laid hands on Jesus and arrested him.

-Matthew 26:47-50 (NRSV)

Lenten Comics day 3

Jesus was deeply grieved + agitated. Overcome by what is about to happen.

Jesus prays.

Lenten Comics day 2

I wasn’t sure if I wanted to discuss this topic, but I have decided to go where the meditations of the stations of the cross lead me.

Jesus was deeply grieved + agitated.

Lenten Comics day 1: Ash Wednesday

INTRODUCTION

This season of Lent, I am contemplating the stations of the cross. The stations of the cross is a Catholic prayer practice of meditating on the Passion of the Christ.

There are 14 stations. Each station is a space to meditate on a particular moment of Jesus’ journey to the cross. There are 7 weeks of Lent. I will be focusing on two stations per week. This will include a depiction of the event, as well as a contemplation of Jesus’ response to what is happening.

“The Passion asks us to find Jesus in the midst of loneliness, heartache, pain, and exhaustion as they occur in our own lives… In modern times, with terrorism, racial strife, and police shootings seemingly all around us, how are we to find God in the midst of all this chaos, anger, and sadness?”

-Gary Jansen

HISTORY

Originally, Christians would travel to Jerusalem to practice this devotion. The spread of Christianity throughout Europe made it difficult for large numbers of poorer Christians to make the journey. The Crusades made it unsafe to visit the city. This led to a local practice with art or sculptures representing each of Jesus’ last moments leading to the cross. I was fortunate enough to pray through the stations depicted along a walking trail at the Bellarmine Jesuit Retreat House while visiting for a prayer retreat in 2018.

There are traditional stations including moments not depicted in the Gospels. In 1991, Pope John Paul II proposed a new list of events depicted in the Gospels. If you are familiar with Mel Gibson’s film The Passion of the Christ (2004), then you might note that the movie follows both the traditional and scriptural stations of the cross. Not coming from a Catholic background, that was my introduction to the practice.

Although I find the traditional stations to be quite beautiful and meaningful, I have decided to contemplate the scriptural stations for the sake of the inclusion of Christians who struggle with Catholicism. You’re welcome.

STATION ONE

Jesus Prays in Gethsemane

“Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane; and he said to his disciples, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, ‘I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.’ And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want.’”

-Matthew 26: 36-39 (NRSV)

Grieved.

Agitated.

Jesus prays.